Fear

What do you fear?


Tough question. At least to me, it's hard to answer. Sometimes it's just hard for us to admit that we fear something. It was hard for me but not anymore.

Months ago, my sister asked me when she wanted to fill a facebook note (the tagging stuff, you know...), "what do you fear?". I answered something that I forgot. I forgot because maybe, it was not my fear, I just made that up. Then I asked back, "what about you?". Then she said," I fear rejection. Don't you fear the same thing?". And I said "No.". Now I know I lied. Well maybe I didn't lie, I just didn't know.

Now I know, I fear rejection, failures, and disappointing others. I realized it just a few hours ago. Today I let people down. I freaked out, I cried, I sweated heavily, my mood crashed, and I felt so terrible. And I started to realize, it always happens to me when I feel rejected or when I let people down. Maybe people would just say "ignore what they say, it's not your fault", but I just can't not care. When I find out that I let people down, I'll start to think that I'm the worst person in the world. Maybe I really am, but thinking about it makes me feel so bad.

At least, now I've admited. It's a good headstart I think. How can you beat an enemy that you don't even know yet?

One advice from me, when you're down, think about alvin and the chipmunks singing a song for you. That's what I did. Their chipmunk voice helps, really :) I thought about this song:

"Christmas christmas time is near,
Time for toys and time for cheers,
We've been good but we can last,
Hurry christmas hurry fast,
Want a plane that loops the loop,
Me I want a hula hoop,
We can hardly stand the wait,
Please christmas don't be late"

I don't even know wether the lyric is right, that's what I remember. I like the rhymes anyway :) in fact I don't even celebrate christmas, but I'm looking forward to it because alvin and the chipmunks the squeakquel will be on theaters on christmas say. Like what DTrix said "we're coming to a theater near you!". :p yes, Quest Crew and Beat Freaks are in the movie. Makes me feel more excited :)

Thanks to friends who are just so cool to be true,
Thanks to Alvin, Simon, and Theodore, for singing a song for me in my mind,
Thanks to Q Fam and Quest Crew and Jabbawockeez, thinkin about you all always makes me feel much better,
Thanks to people whom I let down, you made me realize what I fear. And I'll try to not disappoint you next time :),
Thanks to Mom and Dad for letting me enter this world. This world is really beatiful. :)
Thanks to God who gave me those people above.

YOU ALL ARE THE BUCCEST!
<3

Peace, Love, and Respect,
~Bo~